Temporary Home

Often times, we think that the only people making a difference in this world, religiously, are missionaries. At the beginning of my time here, in San Francisco, I had similar thoughts, I am not doing anything unless I am working away from home, left all my family & friends, and live in a run down apartment, preaching the gospel to those less fortunate. This is false, I can make a difference in my hometown. Today, Steve was teaching, and he said so many times, not everyone is called to get out of their homes, and leave everything to be missional. We can be missional wherever we are. 

It has taken me a lot of time to figure that out, and understand that fully, but I know that when I get home, I will be able to make a difference in the lives there. For the first few weeks of being here, I was stubborn, I wasn't allowing God to talk to me or tell me what my other options were, because I had my own plan of what I was going to do after the summer, a few weeks ago God broke me, I made decisions in spite of how others would be affected, I was only thinking about myself. I thought, in that week, that I was going to move to California, and be a missionary, forever, leave everything and everyone back home and start a "new" life here. But a week after this all happened, I started to realize what I had back home, the amazing people that love me unconditionally, even after screwing up & hurting them when I didn't try to. But now I see what I have, and I don't want to leave that, I think God is allowing me to choose, he gives us paths that we can choose from, all are correct, but we have the freedom to choose. God knows we will succeed in all the paths, but it is up to us to decide.

Not everyone here is on board with my choice of going home & not doing a DTS, but I am trusting God that this is what I need to do and I know that I can do things back home to help those in need.

God just wants us to put him first, if we put him first in everything we do, he will be happy. We have to see this world as being our temporary home & heaven being our eternal home. We need to seek after eternal rewards, not those of this world. But God still wants us to have fun in this life, go, do crazy things, have relationships with others, friendships, but first and foremost seek a relationship with Christ, because he is the only one who can truly satisfy us, he never changes, yet this world is always changing. 

I have been dealing with understanding my thoughts lately, I have become very quiet and very introverted, yet I don't think it is a bad thing, I am figuring out God's plan for me, not through other people telling me what I should do, but through God & I talking, thinking through what may happen.

God is always good, he will always love us, even when we feel distant from him.

Tessa

P.S. 22 Days people :)